I feel like I’ve been employed for a long time but I do not have great experience putting in my two weeks notice. Probably not a bad thing but still weird to do.

Somehow we got one of our kids on the ‘argue opposite’ setting and I’m not sure we’re ever going to find the off switch. The cupboards weren’t banging, she did close them softly, and she does not argue. Sure.

From now on I only want to go grocery shopping when there’s a football game on. There is like nobody out and it’s amazing.

At the end of every family gathering a grue pug snorts every adventurer.

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Me: I’m not sure we really need anything from Costco.

$200 later

Me: I’m still not sure we really needed anything from Costco

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I continue to be absolutely confused about any situation where you lay dozens of workers off instead of cutting executive salaries

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My cat almost fell off my desk and I got tail whipped in the throat. For being covered in fur that tail has a surprising sting.

What if my sweater is in fact not getting eaten by moths but it’s just made with bad yarn that falls apart? I’m just following the clues here, as the inky sweater that seems to get more holes every year I have to 🤔

Someone called the house and it took me two rings to recognize the sound. It’s been a while.

My son is leaking hot tears because we won’t let him go down the steep stairs backwards.

Is sparkling wine and chocolate cupcakes a classic pairing or only in my head because it sounds really great to me.

Driving to hockey and I get to play a game. That smell: is it my gear or something out side of the car?

Kinda weird to have conversations in French with my daughter. Fun though.

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